The Life of Aimers

Sweet Dreams

2010-08-04T13:16:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a pretty good idea. I mean probably a lot of people have been having ideas with this economy. Because everyone seems pretty broke and kind of looking at what to do and what not. A lot of people seem like they are growing weed. That's kind of how things are going.

Anyhow, with that said I had this dream about how I could open a really fancy bakery and all of my treats would be made with weed.

That got me thinking about my past, when I was a young Aimers. Back in like the early 90's...or was it the late 80's my granny owned a bakery in Davis. Nobody in my family knew how to bake or decorate cakes or anything like that so naturally they sent me to a cake decorating school so that at 15 I could decorate all of the cakes we had on order there with the bakery and all of that.

So, I went to this cake decorating school for a while. It was like every Tuesday night for a few months with a couple of older women who were doing it for fun and like one tweeker guy who was trying to get on at Raley's.

I took the class in that one strip mall in Citrus Heights where that Wienershnitzel used to be, I think it might be a Fuddruckers now.

The class was run by Steve. Steve was married to my granny's friend Alva, Steve was really just using Alva for her money but convinced her to open this crazy bakery where they made cookie bouquets. Steve said he used to decorate/bake cakes for all the presidents when he was secret service in the Army.

Long story short I can make some really great frosting roses and leaves and my script to write the people's birthday wishes/names is OFF THE HOOK.

That's my story. If I am able to open my bakery I will locate it in the old Phillip's bakery building on Folsom Blvd and call it Sweet Dreams--because a couple of reasons, it's a Cheech and Chong movie, this came to me in a dream, and cakes are typically sweet--made with sugar.

Aimers Goes Down.

2009-06-30T16:34:00.001-07:00

Today while fashioning the cubicles into a big top circus sort of a theme I totally had a table topple over and hit the back of my leg. While the cubicles look totally awesome, I'm left with this huge contusion. Just my luck.

Turning Goldblum

2009-05-28T16:27:00.000-07:00

I think my at home science project has gone horribly wrong. I bought this weird little kit down at the Antique Fair a few Sundays ago. The man I bought it from said it was a set of telepods that allow instantaneous teleportation of an object from one pod to another....yeah right dude! Was my immediate reaction. But, since they were only $7.00, I decided to go ahead and buy with my out of state two party check which he said he’d go ahead and accept.

Needless to say the telepods have been sitting in my living room collecting dust since I bought them. Until Tuesday night when I went over to Jah-ONE LOVE-Matt’s house to get irie and smoke a spliff. After which I decided to come home and teleport myself to Jamaica so I could play a steel drum with Bob Marley. Great idea, right? Maybe not people....listen to this.

So I hop in my telepod but just before the door automatically closes, my old autographed picture of Jeff Goldblum slips into the pod, unseen by me. After being teleported I emerge from the receiving pod, seemingly normal, but not in Jamaica.... still in my living room with Marley whaling from my clock radio. What the heck?

Now for the last two days I’ve been feeling and acting just like Jeff Goldblum. I’ve grown ¾ inches since Tuesday evening. My hair is growing rapidly into a jew fro and Ed Begley Jr., has been blowing up my celly. If that’s not enough I woke to find a pair of horn rimmed glasses on my bureau this morning next to an old script for Jurrasic Park. Finally, if things weren’t weird enough when my boss asked me to work Saturday I replied,”No pay, no Goldblum. That's it.”

My only fear now is that Geena Davis is going to come in here and blow my head off any minute.

This really sucks!

~ Jeff “Aimers” Goldblum

What's New With Aimers

2009-04-24T11:41:00.000-07:00

Just a few new and exciting things going on with me:

Mondays and Wednesdays I'm teaching yoga at "It's All about Yoga". Come down and learn breathing and stretching techniques that will help heal.

Tuesdays and Thursdays: Working at Espresso Metro, yes folks, we do have ice blended drinks, don't hesitate to come down and cool off.

Fridays: For the most part Fridays are free for me until I begin my Japanese calligraphy course mid-may. Also in the woodworks paper making in my back yard. Have any old cotton, newsprint, or bark that you'd like to make into paper? Call me on my home telephone with availability.

Saturdays: Every Saturday in May I will be teaching an Organic Cooking course at Sierra 2 in room 112. I do ask for a $2 donation.

Sundays: All about me....and the bees. Making local honey alongside one of my dearest friends, Matthew. You may know him as the treasurer of the beekeepers society. Have allergies? Try local honey.

Upcoming events: Asparagus festival; making corn fuel with Bob and Peggy Barts; Recumbent Bicycle Rally;

Again, for more information on any or all of these exciting events, please contact me through this bulletin.

Peace, love, and happiness.
Aimers

An Oldie but a Goodie.

2009-04-22T08:58:00.000-07:00

Sunday morning hangover, in need of food.
Jessica stops by in her minivan, freshly detailed with new wire rims.
Playing the myspace mix CD's we found in the bushes outside of my house, stashed by the 14 year old gangsters from next door, we decide to head out for a late breakfast. Jessica, Jerry and I pile in the minivan and head out to the Sub Shack. I think they actually call it The Shack now. Whatever, it doesn't matter because it was closed. We quickly put what brain we had left, together, to come up with a second breakfast joint choice. Jessica suggest Chargins.

I think Chargins is newly Asian owned and operated so I felt right at home.
We opened the menus and Jessica was happy to see a Kiddie Corner on the menu, meaning we have a new place to take the kids on the weekends to have drinks and breakfast at the same time.

If you've never been to Chargins, it's like an East Sac/Jesuit/St.Frances reunion for twenty somethings fresh out of Sac State or UCDavis who are now back home running the family business. Just about everyone that was in Chargins knew one another (except for us). The type of place where the dudes that are 40 used to be just like the dudes that are 25, and they work for one another's uncles and they've all known each other since they moved to the fab 40's or whatever when they were in Kindergarten. Hella bros and their girlfriends, shorts and flip flops or sandals and backwards sunglasses on baseball hats. Hecka shaka.

Jerry, Jess, and I take a seat, Jessica is facing the football game and happy. I'm facing the twenty something table of douchebags in the corner by the window. It's about one o'clock and they are doing what I think are referred to as Irish Car Bombs. They are loud and cussing and crude. Families with children are looking at them in disgust. One girl in particular starts to get under my skin.

She was wearing a terry cloth tube dress and she was WASTED. She had major drunk face going and she was loud talking. She was going from table to table doing her act hot. Soon though she was just all together plastered. At one point she got up to leave the bar, but the owner had to sit her down and then drama ensued, nobody could let drunky (a.k.a. Courtney) leave because of the fact she'd have killed someone out on Jst with her drunk driving. So, they sit her down and call for someone to pick her up. While she waits for her ride (and apparently forgets that a ride is coming or that she had even attempted to leave in the first place), she continues to take shots and gets even drunker. Now she pulls out her camera and pulls down her terry cloth tube dress, exposes her augmented breasts and takes pictures with her friends for myspace. This went on for about ten minutes, the whole restaurant was like in some sort of mass chaos, not knowing what to do. Every single person staring and involved in all of this insanity. We can't stop laughing and talking sh*t quietly at our table.

Finally our bill comes. We walk to the front door. At this point I looked right at drunk faced Courtney and yelled "HEY, (and she looks up cockeyed) I HOPE YOU CATCH ON FIRE".

We proceeded to walk to the mini van and all of a sudden we hear major Douche dude, say, Hey, I hope YOU catch on fire...and we started laughing, like HA, HA, HA...kind of instigating him/them more...then he said, I've got three girls here that want to kick your as*....and here they come. Courtney is seriously monster walking down the street towards us with the universal you want a piece of me? arms held high in the air.

We got in the minivan, "poor Jerry" was like, lock the doors, and so this swarm of girls and guys come to the window...and Courtney is yelling for Jessica to unlock the door and she is trying to get in the car and Jessica just keeps pointing and laughing at her, and this made that monster more and more angry...then Jessica said, you are a hot mess honey and terry cloth tube dresses went out in 2003...then she rolled down her window and asked the Italian girl and the other littler girl that also wanted to beat us up to move their drunk friend from the rode before she got hit by the minivan....so they moved her, and we left, and we laughed about it all day. It was awesome. The kind of thing hadn't happened in a real long time.

The blind leading.....

2009-04-08T14:12:00.000-07:00

Now that Aimers doesn't have cable television she is forced, not only to speak in third person, but to watch regular old television.

This means fidgeting with the bunny ears atop my hand me down television sans remote control until I pick up a signal. For the last two weeks I've been able to somewhat see American Idol on Tuesday nights.

I'm not sure who else has watched this, but it feels like I'm slowly watching the world crumble. It's horrible. Not only that, they've allowed a blind man to perform. Which, I guess is fine, but how about a little forewarning? Dark glasses? Cane? I don't know.

As I was trying to do a morning talky talk with my co-workers I suggested how creepy American Idol was and how this one guy in particular really freaked me out, the guy that played the piano. Everyone giggled at me and told me he was actually blind. That made a little more sense, I guess. But...what the fuck? What in the fuck is going on?

Ugh.
Aimers

Tom's Pad

2009-04-06T15:38:00.001-07:00

This year the St. Pat's festivities at Tom's Pad were off the hook, so much so, I've only just now been able to get my wits about me to write about it. Apparently we had too many whiskey shots....whew.

Anyways, anyhows, thanks Tommy for all the corned beef cabbage, lamb stew, paper airplanes, LED ZEP, and all that stuff. It's much appreciated.

Erin Go Bragh.

Thunder Bullets

2009-04-06T15:32:00.000-07:00

Where's Aimers?

2009-04-06T15:28:00.001-07:00

See if you can spot Aimers all up in the local nightlife, 916 bebe.

Warrior

2009-04-06T15:26:00.000-07:00

I don't have much to say about this except for my child is better than most.

Quick List

2009-04-06T15:20:00.001-07:00

Hello folks.
Here is a quick list of current things that have been annoying Aimers. Please take note:

Allergies (not mine, other people's...get over it already)
Economy Talk
Email Forwards
Babies
Chirping Birds
Girl Scout Cookies
Commuter Mugs
Talking
Bread Bowls
Bridge Tolls
Fashion

I guess that's it for now. I said it was a quick list.
Aimers

Mi Vida Loca

2009-01-09T13:36:00.001-08:00

Over the last several months I've been spending a lot more time with my homegirls. Recently they talked me into a cut and color. I'm not sure what to think, I'm just getting used to the yellow highlights. I think it washes me out a little bit but I trust their opinions.

Hope that everything is joyous and your 2009 is coming along swimmingly.
Claro Que Si,
Aimers

Christmas Casual

2008-12-23T09:51:00.001-08:00

Hello fans. Sorry for not writing. I've taken time off to grow out my hair and it is taking up a lot more time than I'd anticipated in the beginning. Hopefully the pay off will be worth it. Anyhow....there is something I'd like to discuss this holiday season. It is what I'd like to refer to as Christmas Casual.

This is a phenom that I noticed last week on a trip to Los Angeles. It was a bustling Friday morning at the Southwest terminal. Usually I'd be met with mid-morning business travelers decked out in their best Friday biz-cas outfits. But, because it is the month of December it seemed that everyone turned in their corporate polos and jeans for Christmas inspired sweatshirts, sweaters, and socks.

The woman I have pictured (we'll call her Denise for the sake of the article) is obviously taking care of business as pronounced with her blue tooth ear piece and smart haircut. The only difference here is that Denise is also ringing in the holidays with her head to toe Christmas ensemble paired with a very smart Gloria Vanderbilt jean. This look allows Denise to say, "hey look corporate America, not only can I talk very loudly at the airport about mundane business transactions but I can deck the halls!"

I know that Christmas is quickly approaching and I did mean to relay this information sooner so that you could dress Chris-Cas for your December Fridays, but hopefully you have one or two pot lucks before you are officially out of office.

Have a safe and happy holiday season.
Aimers

Congratulations!

2008-11-05T17:54:00.000-08:00

This is such an exciting time, we've finally got our president elect and it just so happens to be Barack Obama. I can't ever remember feeling so excited about an election. I'm proud to call him my president and look forward to see how we change as a nation in the coming years.

Not only do I think that Obama is going to be a wonderful president, I feel proud to call him a role model. The love he has for his wife and children make me tear up every time I see them together. To me they represent what a family should be. Strong values, support of one another, and most importantly LOVE.

I'm sorry to those who were affected by Prop 8 here in California as I think it is nothing but unfair, but I do have hope that we will see that turn around in the very near future.

I've never been one to be patriotic or to have ever even waved a United States flag, but at this point in time, I have a rejuvenated patriotism and I am just overwhelmed with emotions for our new presidential family.

Congratulations OBAMA family. Thank you for representing all that is good.
~Aimers

Costume Idea

2008-10-29T17:53:00.001-07:00

Halloween is quickly approaching so I went down to Wishing Well this afternoon. Everything is pretty much picked over, but I was able to find a Beth Chapman costume on sale.

Now I can be the Dog's sidekick with this standard issue costume. Beth's costume features her big blond wig, with a black dress and dark sunglasses. The costume also includes handcuffs, a necklace, and a knife with leg strap.

Be forewarned, cheap perfume and a carton of cigarettes is not included with the basic costume, I'd suggest C&B Liquors for these last minute accessories.

Unfortunaltey it looked as though Dog, Leland, Baby Lisa, and Youngblood costumes were already sold out.

Happy trick or treating,
Aimers

Redemption

2008-10-21T16:26:00.000-07:00

Maybe I'm just totally nuts, but I think I remember something about Britney Spears being completley off her rocker like four months ago. Should we just chalk it all up to breakdown '08?

Aimers Defies Death

2008-09-25T09:14:00.001-07:00

As many of you know David Blaine just performed his latest death defying trick, the Death Dive. This is the one where he hung upside down for something like 60 hours then took a dive off the platform from which he hung landing right back onto his steel toed boots.

Can you imagine, hanging upside down, for sixty hours? I couldn't either, not until this morning, that is. This morning I decided to try this act out on my own. I set the timer on the oven for twenty minutes, then got onto the couch and positioned myself so that I hung just off it's edge. The first five minute were a breeze, I thought...what's the big deal Blaine? But as 15 minutes rolled around I began to feel hungry, I needed to go to the bathroom, and my face started to feel funny. Puchi, my fucking cat, kept rubbing her body back and forth on my cheeks, making me feel like I had to sneeze. I didn't think I would make it to 20 minutes. It took all my mental strength to reach that twenty minute mark.

Finally, the buzzer from the oven rang....my twenty minutes were up. Since I couldn't really do a dive off the couch I chose to do a backwards somersault. I landed it with no problems. As you can imagine, the whole experience was life changing.

I sit here sharing my experience via blog with a new lease on life, ready for my next adventure. I'm on top of the WORLD!!! I feel like Tom Cruise. I feel superhuman, like I could take a bullet and not even get hurt.

Welp, I need to go get my daily french crueler and feed Nipperkin.
Here's to YOUR next adventure fans!!

~Cheers,
Aimers

Homo Sapien Spotting

2008-09-16T08:15:00.000-07:00

Homo Sapien spotting in East Sacramento.

These two adult male homo sapiens were spotted Sunday in their natural environment, East Sacramento.
When observed the pair picked up dry cleaning, ate grilled chicken sandwiches with goat cheese and roasted red pepper on foccacia bread, drank a pint of Stella Artrois, and slowly made their way back to an Audi wagon with ski racks.

As evidenced by the picture the homo sapiens were in weekend wear. Cargo shorts with extra pockets, light blue button ups, and flip flops (was not close enough to see if they were Havianas, looked like something from American Eagle).

In my professional opinion the two probably know one another from attending Sacramento State. It would also be safe to assume that both have given best man speeches at some point in their lives and that they were spending time together, only briefly, while their girlfriends were getting mani/pedis.

My investigation of the species continues.

Dr. Aimerstein

Close Call

2008-09-05T10:34:00.001-07:00

Thank you to the good folks at Sutterville Elementary for rescuing my bird, Nipperkin.

Last night around 9:30 p.m. I approached Nipperkin's cage to give him one last treat and cover up his cage so that he could rest. As I approached I could not hear him. Our nightly routine is that he yells out "Nippy love mama"; not last night.

I frantically searched the house, I quickly realized he was gone. As you can imagine I was completely devastated and unable to sleep. I kept thinking I could hear him just outside my window, "Nipperkin wants in mama", but whenever I'd look out, he wasn't there.

So, this morning I began my search. I got out of bed at 5 a.m. and started walking the streets calling for him. When I approached Marie's donuts for my morning French Crueler, I had tears in my eyes. Mai Pan who works the counter asked "what wrong with you now?" with tears in my eyes, I told her about Nipperkin.

Mai Pan told me that her last customer had just picked up a baker's dozen for Sutterville Elementary as they had an extra guest in the office today, a beautiful bird. I said, "Mai, do you think they have my Nipperkin?!" Mai can't really understand anything I say so she just pointed to a sign posted on the window about a found bird.

I ate my crueler and hi-tailed it down to Sutterville, where to my surprise, Nipperkin was perched on the filing cabinet over Ms. Sony's head.

Nipperkin, "YOU PRANKSTER!", I thought to myself. Is this how you go about getting a donut?? After a few minutes, I really wasn't even mad, I was just releived to see him.

Thank you again, Mai Pan, Ms. Sony, and all the other good people in the area. I appreciate your concern for Nipperkin. I appreciate it more than any of you will ever know.

Sincerley,
Aimers

BITER!!!

2008-09-05T10:27:00.001-07:00

Remember last year when I went to the California State Fair and nuzzled up with a llama and shortly thereafter Anold read my blog and was pictured in the Sacramento Bee doing the EXACT same thing? I'm sure if you are an avid reader it rings a bell. Well, he's at it again, and this time he's on Island Time.

The Sacramento Bee reports:

Partying without Schwarzenegger in St. Paul

Even if he wasn't physically in St. Paul, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger was here in spirit - and in DVD.

The Republican governor gave out DVDs as parting gifts at the "Island Fever" bash he hosted Tuesday night for California delegates. As with virtually everything at the convention, even the gifts were sponsored - these came from the Motion Picture Association of America.

Staff handed out Schwarzenegger flicks such as Conan the Barbarian, Twins and Around the World in 80 Days, in addition to non-Schwarzenegger films like Transformers. As one delegate considered selecting the film Junior, an aide noted, "Arnold is pregnant in it!"

One of the most popular choices was Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, part of Schwarzenegger's signature film series. But if delegates looked carefully at the dimly lit gift table outside, they would have seen that many of the Terminator 3 discs were in HD-DVD, the loser in the DVD format war - essentially the Betamax of our time.

Retailers sell the discs in discount bins because the format is defunct. But MPAA and Schwarzenegger may have just answered the question as to how to get rid of the remaining HD-DVD discs: use them as parting gifts.

Doesn't this guy have any original ideas? Last year he copies my state fair theatrics, and this year he's stolen my 2008 motto?
Austrians, eh?

Perfect Match

2008-09-04T08:17:00.000-07:00

How much does it suck that Tina Fey is no longer doing skits on Saturday Night Live, she would've done the most PERFECT Sarah Palin impression ever. I can just hear her now asking, "do you know what the difference is between hockey moms and pitbulls?" pause, look at camera "LIPSTICK!".....oh the laughs that could be had.

Braggart McBraggart

2008-09-03T17:11:00.000-07:00

Yeah dude, thanks for rubbing it in, of course I want a 1982 Vette with gold shudder tail lights, no duh. Sheesh, rub it in why don't you?! People these days.

WARNING CURTIS PARK!!!

2008-09-03T09:25:00.000-07:00

Now that Gio is in school and I've got no job; I decided to set off on a nice morning walk. Thankfully I found this sign posted to a wooden telephone pole in Curtis Park, it's a warning, it reads:

*WARNING*
DO NOT SHOP AT THE CURTIS PARK MARKET!
THE NEWEST OWNER IS A THIEF!
I KNOW THIS BECAUSE HE CONSTANTLY OVER CHARGES ME FOR ITEMS I
HAVE PURCHASED THERE FOR 2 YEARS.
WHEN I TRY TO TELL HIM THE PRICE MARKED FOR A GIVEN ITEM, HE YELLS AND ME
AND INSISITS ON SELLING ITEMS AT THE WRONG PRICE.
DON'T GET STOLEN FROM.
SHOPE SOMEWHERE ELSE-BOYCOTT THE CURTIS PARK THEIF!

Wowzers, thankfully I saw this sign. I'm hoping when we purchase the market that the residents of land park and curtis park will go back to being satisfied and not have to deal with anymore dirty thieves.

First Day Of School

2008-09-02T17:16:00.001-07:00

First day of school has finally arrived. The summer went by WAY too fast, but I think Gio enjoyed everything he was able to do. Skate board camp, Virginia, and learning to swim....all accomplished this summer, and now he starts a new year. So far, so good. New shoes, new shirts, and new jeans. He likes his teacher and found out today that his best friend is being moved into his class, if you ask me, it doesn't get any better than that. The fridge is stocked with juice boxes and Wonder bread. The shelves are equipped with HoHo's, fruit leathers, and goldfish crackers. I think it's the beginning of a wonderful year. If I were still at work this would be the second day of Q1 Fiscal Year '09.....ahhhh, don't miss that.

Lates.
Aimers

Go Ahead and Jump

2008-08-28T22:29:00.000-07:00

I was so used to that piece of shit PC at work, pardon my lack of blogging.

Being laid off.....where do I begin? I'll start right here....wait a second, did I tell you I was laid off? Well, I am.

You know I can remember my dad, Ed, being laid off so many times as a kid. He was in construction. He drank a lot of beer. He had no education. He had me at 19 years old. He had DUI's (knocked his teeth out). He left my mom. He drove a red Trans Am. He listened to the Miami Vice soundtrack, relentlessly.

Ed Anspach's idea of a good time was pizza and a pitcher of beer. He never spent time with me even though I begged him to. Ed eventually left my beautiful mom and married a woman named Rhonda who loved air brushed blue carnations.... but.... I loved him....he was the most funny and handsome human being I'd ever witnessed....but I never wanted to be him.

While I knew it was bad that he was laid off as we lived in our Citrus Heights tract home with no car or health care; I always figured there was probably something he had done to deserve the lay off. Whether it was his lack of education, his weekends in jail, or just bad weather. There always seemed to be a reason for him not having a job.

Now, here I am pushing 36 years old, a super important bachelor's degree in hand, 16 years of dedicated work experience, any and every thing I could do not to end up like my dad....I did........and now....with all of that said.... I find I am laid off.

What gives? I took all the right precautions. I got my bachelor's degree, I mentored/tutored/spoke up/kept my mouth shut/ listened/managed/believed/gained respect/gave respect/dedicated eight years/was fair/was constructive...... blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

I still end up like Ed. It's frustrating. But, I have hope.

My point is....my random thoughts... the Weston's .....the Burritos...; The Langtry's...EMC, Ed Anspach, Mary Holley, my punker Grandma who converted to a democrat this week...Delshawn, Oliver Ong, dave neilsen, IADT, UOP, SSA, SPB, EAII, OPP, hyderbad, my creative, beautiful mom...my loving oakie granny.....my BEAUTIFUL son.....all of these things....lead me to believe in the HOPE that Obama spoke of tonight. The willingness to accept. Empathy. Love. Dedication. Giving. Goodness.

Live it BITCHES. In the mean time.....jump rope to the the smuggler's blues.

Shout out to Scott Bain.

Irish Gangsters

2008-07-28T11:15:00.000-07:00

These two met when they were ten months old. They've been best friends since. Only time will tell where the world will take them, but I'm quite sure they'll be shakin' up Land Park in no time.

Camping Trip

2008-07-28T11:14:00.001-07:00

This weekend was FANTASTIC a quick camping trip to Sugar Pine Reservoir with the kids, KID TIME. This picture demonstrates G finding and cathing a one eyed toad. Though the bottom of my feet my forever be stained with red dirt, I don't care. I had the best time ever....chatting, eating, drinking, skinny dipping, star gazing, failed attempts at rafting....it was glorious. Aimers likes camping.

Stop!!

2008-07-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

Today Aimers would like to say, that you should take time to smell the roses. They are pressure washing the building here today so it's really loud and I'm getting a major migraine. I may have an age old case of the Mondays.

Aimers

Fun with Pictures

2008-07-25T12:40:00.000-07:00

Check this out: http://www.photofunia.com/

Croc Charms

2008-07-24T15:12:00.001-07:00

Curtis Park Dream Store: COMING SOON

2008-07-09T15:47:00.000-07:00

I have to admit my spirits have been down since finding out that guy from Willie's hamburgers ended up getting Fuji. But, whatever, I'm Aimers, I move on people.

It all started last week. I entered Curtis Park Market and the wafting smell of rat piss filled my nostrils. I was there for my usual, pack of Kools and single tall can of malt liquor....but this time, I wanted popsicles too. As I wrote my check for $4.32, I asked the cashier "why no popsicles?". He says, "no worry, I get for you", and pretends to write down popsicles on some "shopping list" of future items to buy for the store. Knowing I would never come back for the popsicles, it all dawned on me. I'm buying Curtis Park Market and making it a dream store, for all the Curtis Park/Land Park people.

My new store is going to be totally awesome. For starters people in the parks, Curtis and Land, like organic shit, home made ice cream, specialty meats, cheeses, beer (no singles), wine...I'm going to have all of that and lasagna. I'm going to have lots of sauces, BBQ rubs, and baked goods. As a matter of fact, I'm going to carry Old Soul baked goods and coffee, because that place is super hip.

I'm going to expand the parking lot so there are like 10 different bicycle racks for all the fixed gear bicycles. Mopeds and scooters will have their own parking structure and I'll have two separate alternative fueling stations. One hemp and one corn oil. And it's going to be all old timey where someone comes and pumps your alternative fuel for you, while washing your windows.

This dream store will also have a totally rad courtyard out back and Jerry Perry is going to book shows there when we have wine tasting and appetizer night. There will be a big relaxing fountain so you can read the San Francisco Chronicle, Midtown Monthly or your Sac State Alumni magazines next to it, total chill time. Sometimes when it's nice out we can have local neighbors, like that one kids dad from Crocker Riverside give gardening classes in the back... organic, of course.

Were not going to forget about the babies either. When you come into the store you can check out one of our hemp baby slings for dad to wear while you shop. We'll have baby massage, baby yoga, breast feeding support groups and we'll be the very first store in the area to sell a full selection of fresh breast milk made by local moms.

Speaking of Moms, we haven't forgotten about you. You'll be pleased to know we offer knitting circles, hair braiding classes, oil/soap making courses, vegan potlucks, mixed martial arts classes and yoga taught by the "SF Yoga Girl". And, once the housing market gets better, were going to do mortgages in our office space... oh.... while I'm on the subject, please don't forget I'm a notary public, and am here for any of your notary needs.

Furthermore...NO SHOPPING BAGS WHATSOEVER.

Too good to be true? I certainly hope not. But just to be safe, I'm going to go down and write a check out for three California State Lottery tickets as soon as I get off of work. Please, seriously, keep your fingers crossed. I don't want another Fuji situation on my hands.

I look forward to servicing all of your annoying needs,
Aimers

(Thanks April for the inspiration)

Belly Dancing

2008-06-24T14:38:00.000-07:00

I started belly dancing again. Feels good to jingle jangle my finger clankers, I forgot how much I love my coin belt.

Aimers

Performance Art Camp

2008-06-18T12:26:00.000-07:00

I just completed the Jonesey C. Starlight Performance Art Camp off the cost of Mendocino. I've included pictures of some of the things I am now able to do, like twist through a hula hoop.

For those of you who do not have any performance art experience I would recommend this introductory course. For three days Jonesey teaches you the basics of performance art. Costuming, speaking through a bullhorn, and basic hula hooping are all part of this beginner's course. Cost of the two day seminar is only $150.00. As Jonesey explains this money will be made back in spades upon your first public performance.

I always thought I had what it would take to become a semi-professional performance artist. After this experience I am even more confident that I can make my dreams a reality.

Because Jonesey is not licensed; this course is by word of mouth only. For those of you interested, please drop me a line or call my cellular telephone.

Good day,
aimers

Office Foods

2008-06-17T16:17:00.001-07:00

I can imagine that every office freezer looks about like the one here, jam packed with ice cream and Lean Cuisines. Whose eating these things anyways?

Badu Bay-bay.

2008-06-10T10:23:00.000-07:00

These two gorillas were out in full effect last night at the Paramount Theatre in Oakland to see our girl Erykah....but not before taking a picture in front of this airbrushed backdrop...PHOTOS!!! During our time at the photo shoot, one young lady asked us to move, so her moms could take a picture of her with her cellular telephone, without paying the $10 for the actual picture. That was quickly vetoed by the airbrush photo booth operator and we got our sweet ass picture in mere minutes. We've both decided never to wear these jeans again.

Have a bless-ed day,
Aimers

Cats Suck!

2008-06-05T16:32:00.001-07:00

Aimers has always, always, had a siamese cat. Like seriously all of my life. When I was little I had one named Maya and I thought she was my best friend until she took her claws and ripped open my forehead while I was petting her. So, anyhow, now I've had this other siamese cat named Puchimaru for like 14 years and while I try to give her away to someone pretty much every day because I can't fucking stand her, nobody will take her. I've moved four times in an attempt to try to shake that dang cat, no such luck. Here I will post some of the top reasons I hate my cat:

1. Cat litter. Not only does cat litter stink and you get stuck having to change a litter box, it gets all over the place. Each time after that stupid cat takes a disgusting shit, she shakes her paws all over the tile floor. I have to sweep three times a day just so litter doesn't stick to the bottom of my feet, DISGUSTING.

2. Hair. Cat hair gets everywhere, all over my clothes, my couch, even my ironing board. I spend like $1,000 in lint brushes per year. Nobody looks good covered in cat hair, plus it makes you sneeze.

3. Meowing. Meowing is annoying, especially when you have a SIAMESE cat, they are like 10 times louder than a normal cat. Fuckers. You can't lock these cats out of the house, they meow to get back in, they are relentless.

4. Food crunching in the middle of the night. For some reason this cat eats in the middle of the night, so all you hear around 3 a.m. is loud crunching.

5. Playing at inappropriate times. Much like the food thing, this cat, Puchi...she plays games, like running around and ball dribbling in the middle of the night, making it impossible to sleep.

6. Cuddling. I do not want cuddle time with this motherfucker. Seriously, she makes dough on skin, sucks blankets like she's nursing, and drools....sickening.

7. Purring. Purring is annoying and loud, I hate purring.

8. Drinking. Even if you were to sit out four different water vessels, this cat will choose to drink out of the fish bowl. This gets hair into the fish bowl, which means there is more for me to clean. Fucking CAT DUDE!!

9. She's mean and sneaky. Don't get me wrong, Puchi is a beautiful cat, this is why it is so tempting to pet her...but don't be fooled people. Everyone that has ever tried to pet Puchi has been brutally attacked with blood. She's horrible.

10. She likes me. This is the worst part of it all, as mean as I am to this cat, she likes me. She's never bitten me, she always wants to sit on my lap, and tries over and over to get on my pillow every single night. This bitch will not get the hint.

There you have it folks, my top ten reasons for hating my stupid ass cat.
Would anyone like to take her home for their own?

Thanks,
Aimers

Oh man, just thought of another one....she's ruined my couch. Like most cats, they find it necessary to sharpen their disgusting toe nails on the couch. Now one whole side/arm of the couch is shredded with like strings coming out so it NEVER EVER looks CLASSY!! I'm so IRRITATED right now!!

WHAT????

2008-05-27T16:51:00.000-07:00

Guitar Heros?

2008-05-27T16:15:00.000-07:00

After a two day bender, I headed to Blockbuster for mindless entertainment. I mean, even though I've received six different "free NETFLIX for a month" certificates, I'm still going to Blockbuster. Whatever!!, as I pulled in to Blockbuster there was some mass hysteria happening in the parking lot. They had streamers, signs, and balloons...so I decided to park on a side street and walk up, just in case I had to make a quick get-a-way.

I said a two day bender people, on top of whooping cough, things were hazy, I couldn't quite figure out what was going on. All I wanted was a movie, anything, something funny, something sad...didn't matter.

I enter that dang Blockbuster and to my disgust, they are staging a Rock Wars; Battle of the Bands type of thing, with Guitar Hero.

These are grown men on fake guitars battling one another at a Blockbuster in a strip mall. "Sweet Emotion" by Aerosmith was !BLASTING! What in the hell is happening these days? Honestly, is everything losing its mind? Can this be turned around?

I don't like people thinking they can so freely do whatever they want and walk around being so openly nerdy.

I'm disgsuted,
Aimers

Drastic Times Call for Dramatic Measures

2008-05-27T10:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I like to get very dramatic and crank up the Smiths.
Park the car at the side of the road
You should know
Time's tide will smother you
And I will too
When you laugh about people who feel so
Very lonely
Their only desire is to die
Well, I'm afraid
It doesn't make me smile
I wish I could laugh

But that joke isn't funny anymore
It's too close to home
And it's too near the bone
It's too close to home
And it's too near the bone
More than you'll ever know ...

Kick them when they fall down
Kick them when they fall down
You kick them when they fall down
Kick them when they fall down
You kick them when they fall down
Kick them when they fall down
You kick them when they fall down
Kick them when they fall down

It was dark as I drove the point home
And on cold leather seats
Well, it suddenly struck me
I just might die with a smile on my
Face after all

Growing my Dreads

2008-05-19T15:29:00.000-07:00

After much debate, I've decided I'm going to go ahead and grow my dreadlocks back out. Should be pretty easy for all of my summer festivals.

Aimee Likey

2008-05-13T16:45:00.000-07:00

This week Joan at my Red Hat group posed an interesting question to the group. She asked, "what are some of the things you love most?" After much thought, here are some of the things I can't live without (in no particular order):

Maxwell House Coffee
I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (hilarious)
Arnold Palmer (1/2 iced tea; 1/2 lemonade=100% delicious)
Ambrosia
jigsaw puzzles
miniature trains
Reading the TV Guide
Triscuits
Anything purple
home schooling
bird watching
skip-bo
Black Angus
Raisins
Live with Regis and Kelly

Favorite Phrases:
Answering the phone 'hola'
See Ya' Wouldn't Wanna Be Ya'
Where's the Beef?
Well, Excuuuuuse ME!!

That's all I could come up with for now.

Pleat Fronts

2008-05-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

At what point in your adult life do you say to yourself, "hey, I'm going to go ahead and buy myself a pair of pleat front trousers"? I don't get it.

Friday Night Concert in the Park

2008-05-02T16:10:00.000-07:00

Somehow I always get talked into going, a phone call from one of the girls saying to meet them at Cesar Chavez park for Concert in the Park. Once agreed upon I spend my work day thinking about how quickly I can get home after work so that I can take off my biz-cas fri, carefully place my lanyard on my bedside table, and change clothes, in time to meet my friends.

As I make my way to the park, I suddenly remember how much I hate going. Yet, I'm about two blocks from my final destination. As I search for a parking spot for the next twenty or so minutes, I debate on going home, but I don't. My phone buzzes a million times with texts asking where the hell I am. I go around and around each block trying to find a parking spot, and finally, 12 blocks from Cesar Chavez I find my spot.

Out of the car the wind whips my face and I can hear the drums. I have butterflies in my stomach and Gio is already complaining that he is cold and hungry and can no longer walk. As I carry him in my arms the next 10 blocks I finally arrive. I wait in line for my red bracelette that signifies I have the ability to mingle in the beer garden. I search for friends, circling the crowd with my eyes, over and over again...they are nowhere to be found, lost in a sea of gorgeous tattooed Sacramento. I decide to get in the drink tickets line and to my surprise there are all of my friends. We each buy $20 worth of drink tickets...then proceed to the beer/wine line.

For the next 42 minutes we hold our place in line. We inch our way up to get a drink and when I'm about five people away from getting my drink, I can no longer ignore Gio's pleas to go to the restroom. So, I hand my tickets to a BFF and beg they get my drink while I go to the port-o-potty line. For the next 23 minutes I listen to Gio cry that he is going to pee his pants. Nobody will allow us to cut in front of them because they are in similar situations. The smell of urine and cigarettes in my nose, while some unknown band jams it to pieces. I'm so mad.

Once out of the port-o-potty, I frantically search for my friends, they are nowhere to be found...did they leave?? Where are they?? I haven't even had a sip of that box wine yet. I feel like crying a little bit, because now Gio is hungry. But, everything is "DISGUSTING!" I finally see my friends, grimaces on faces, wine in hands, yelling at some dude. Because I've been gone for 37 minutes, my wine is 1/4 full and it is now time to repeat going to the beer/wine line.

I tell my friends that I will stay in line this time so they can take their kids to the port-o-potty. I patiently wait in line staring at all the ugly people. Sometimes I see someone I don't want to see and make very small talk. When I get to the front of the line they are out of wine, so I have to get BUD LIGHT. I'm also informed that I can only get two drinks per person, but I promised BFF I'd get her a drink....so I get someone else in line to get a drink for my friend with my tickets. I hold three beers in the corner by the beer/wine line and wait. BFF's emerge 20 minutes later, grab their Bud Light's and we are informed that it is time to go....we have $12 worth of tickets left that we will lose before the next time we decide to go to Concert in the Park.

This has gone on for the last decade. I will see you there.

E-mail Club's List of Stuff the Whites Like

2008-05-01T10:17:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if all of you have seen the website "Stuff White People Like", but taking a cue from it, my email club and I came up with our own list of stuff the whites like and here it is for your viewing pleasure:

Home/Boat/RV/ Shows
Using their elementary Spanish at Mexican restaurants
Sushi
Pottery Barn and Crate and Barrell
French Manicures
Tiffaney ID bracelettes
Jack Johnson
Cupcakes
Talking about getting the cement porch laid for the new backyard
Putting censors on their front and back doors so they can hear if the kids get out
Uncomfortable dinner parties
Greeting Cards
Spray Tan
The Bachelor/Dancing With the Stars/So You Think are Smarter than a 5th Grader
Home Improvment Projects
Class Reunions/Weddings/Baby Showers/Bridal Showers/Birthday Parties/30 year old parties/retirement parties/over the hill parties
Waldorf Salad...salads in general
lacoste polos
going green
"underground"
crocs
loving the "diversity" in presidential candidates but having no intention to vote for either
flip flops
hiking
lamenting racism
european ancestry
laughing at white people jokes
Capri Pants
Outlet Stores
designer pets
costco
haggling
craigslist
urban development
plaid
baby einstein
orbit strollers/jogging strollers/double wide strollers
awarness
fancy tea
small sandwiches
pergo flooring
gazebos
ART WALKS/ PUB CRAWLS
havarti cheese
darfur
remixes
tivo
hybrids
ikea
loose powder make up (Bare Minerals)
loving people "to death"
COACH
Chile rellenos, or as they like to say “Chili reh-lawn-oes
protein bars
healthy tortillas
chipotle
Abercrombie & Fitch
hats
recognition
brainstorming sessions
appletinis
"party" playlists
minimal dancing at parties
instructional dances
khaki pants
blue dress shirts
the song TEQUILA, dancing like Pee Wee Herman
Golf
living on a golf course
Christmas
high fives/fist pounds
Oprah
Scrapbooking
Slumming It
Girl's night/guy's night
The Beatles
Signing petitions
Golden retreivers
Subarus
Watersports
kettle corn
MacIntosh
Delegating
boats/personal watercraft
snow
cole haan
taking charge
lists

Flontage

2008-04-30T12:43:00.000-07:00

Welp folks, I finally created the word I was looking for and it is FLONTAGE. Flontage is a verb and it represents the finger action that contestants on shows like American Idol or Dancing With the Stars do during voting ceremonies. This picture shows Sanjayah flontaging. He wants the American public to vote for him and his voting number ends in four. Instead of holding up four fingers, Sanjaya flontages. He uses two fingers on both hands to represent four...two plus two equals four. He probably flipped his fingers back and fourth and may have even done a dance in which he took the twos and held them to his eyes kind of like how John Travolta danced in Pulp Fiction.

Please note this word was created and is trademarked by me, but you can use it as often as you'd like.

Good day,
Aimers

Winner!!

2008-04-16T16:11:00.000-07:00

Welp folks, this has been some week. I think you remember back on Monday that I won a bicycle helmet, well, now look...a book!!! Not only am I a leader, I am a WINNER!!!

Stuff is Tuff

2008-04-15T10:45:00.000-07:00

Young, Hand-fed, Tame, Male, Blue & Gold Macaw needs new home. He comes with his DNA sexing certificate (paid $50.00), California Cage with Playtop-largest made (paid $900.00), his manzanita stand on wheels (paid $60.00), a rope perch (paid $35.00) for use inside or outside the cage, his shower perch(paid $35.00), his toys (paid over $150.00)of which there are many, and a half bag (20 lbs.) of Kaytee Exact Macaw food plus food treats. I will not split this up, it all goes as one package because I want him to have the as much of the life he is used to and things he is comfortable with so the change will be as non-stressful as possible. He will come with a list of phrases and tricks. Please realize this is a huge investment and my rehoming fee will reflect this.

He is a very social bird and needs a lot of time. He says about 25 phrases (no 4 letter words!) plays games (Peek-a-Boo and "Up-Down-Left-Right"), dances when you sing or play music for him, waves to you by picking up his foot and curling and uncurling his toes several times in rapid succession, does a high five, loves to go anywhere and especially on car rides (on the passenger seat back or passenger head rest). He loves to be petted on his head, neck, upper back, under his wings, and can lay in your arms like a baby for a tummy rub. He will eat whatever you eat and can use a spoon to eat.

I am asking a rehoming fee (somewhat negotiable), expect a visit from a prospective owner to meet him, and will then do a home check. I want the best home for him and am dedicated to finding that home. Anyone looking to breed, have several other large birds, or are not experienced with large birds need not apply

Spring Art and Kite Show

2008-04-15T09:38:00.000-07:00

I know that many of you are busy but I am going to extend an invitation out to my newest art reception at the Effie Yeaw Nature Center on Saturday. This exhibition is a collaborative venture and includes the works of many local artists, everything from wood carvings to silk flower arranging. I will be showing my latest series of sand art inspired by Island Time. If you get the urge please come and join the good people that are participating in this event. We will be having cookies and punch after the art show to celebrate Allen Johnston's kite flying competition, exciting for sure.

Effie Yeaw Nature Center
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Art Show 11-2:00
Kite Competition 2:00-4:00

If you need directions or further instruction, please give me a ring.
Aimers

Green With Envy?

2008-04-14T17:32:00.000-07:00

There have been many exciting things happening to Aimers this month, but none that can compare to what happened to me in the last two days. Around 4:00 today I was notified that I'd won a raffle. Here at the office we are doing our part in going green. With Earth Day quickly approaching the Go Green Team is raffling many useful items that, help us, help our environment. Each day this week a raffle prize winner is determined, and, as you can see by the picture...my name was chosen. To my surprise I won a bicycle helmet AND water bottle, both green (get it?). It's really funny because I'm always the one that's all "I never win anything", and now here I am WINNING a bicycle helmet and a bird show in the very same week.

I'm overwhelmed with happiness and gratitude for my good fortune.
Have a great evening.

Aimers

Nipperkin

2008-04-14T14:55:00.000-07:00

Good News folks, Nipperkin won the first place Blue Ribbon honor at the Avian Exhibition in Milpitas, CA this weekend. In honor of his victory Nipperkin was rewarded with a 20 lb bag of bird seed (the good kind) and a salt chew. What the judges don't know is that Nipperkin is a bad birdy. When we got home he chewed mommy's favorite piece of origami. That dang bird, but how can you stay mad, look at him....he's just beautiful.

Island Time.

2008-04-02T16:43:00.000-07:00

I'm on self declared Island Time from now until who knows when, I couldn't tell you because I don't have a watch or a calendar, because I'm so relaxed and nothing bothers me. If you aren't familiar with Island Time you should be. Island Time is all about major chillin' (maxin' and relaxin'). Whether you live near the beach or just visit Blue Gecko on Wednesday nights on the Sacramento River. It's totally, totally, chill. It's all about kickin' it. Island Time means you can always wear flip flops and shorts (24-7). When you think about Island Time, think about Matthew McConaughey (www.matthewmcconaughey.com) or your most recent visit to Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville (www.margaritaville.com). Are you catchin' my drift; mon? If you are, then you should come check me out this weekend at:

The Beach Hut Deli Jam Sesh
3p.m. to 4:15.
North Natomas
3654 North Freeway Blvd.
Suite 325
Sacramento, CA
Tele: (916) 575-7500

I will be playing the bongo/steel drum in an effort to raise money to go to Sandals, Jamaica with my juggling troupe in September.

No shoes? No shirt? NO PROBLEM!!

Zion and One Love
Hope to see you at the show,
Aimers

***Island Time should in no way be referred to as chillaxin'******

Evan Dando

2008-03-26T16:59:00.001-07:00

I like saying the name Evan Dando. Evan Dando. I could say it one million times, Evan Dando.

A Few Things I Don't Like.....

2008-03-25T14:46:00.000-07:00

Accents (including baby talk)
Flourscent lighting
The term "You rock!"
Over eating
Payless Shoe Source
Scented lip gloss
Cinammon
Small dogs
Blisters
Mopeds
Jamba Juice
Running
Socks
Small Talk (chit chat)
The Beach Boys
Chicken Breasts
Opinions

SPRING BREAK!!!!!

2008-03-18T14:36:00.001-07:00

OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UNICORN COLLECTION

2008-03-18T11:41:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone. As you all know I have a pretty impressive unicorn collection. Well, because I've had to replace the brakes in my car, I'm looking to make a few extra dollars. While it pains me to have to get rid of some of my unicorns I figured that maybe they'd go to a good home if one of you were able to take these off my hands. This is a Lot of 6 Enesco Rainbow Dreams Unicorn figurines. In Good Used Condition. Sorry, I dont have boxes for them. Figurines include:
Dreams Come True(with certificate of authenticity)
The Courtship(this is a set of two that when put together make a beautiful heart,has certificate of authenicity)
Butterflies and Rainbow Skies(has certificate of authenicity)
Where Bluebirds Fly(has certificate of authenicity)
Moonbeam Dreams
Chasing a Dream Buyer can also have Tender Love for FREE!!(this is a set of two that when put together make a beautiful heart, this set is damged due to a broken horn).
Asking $40 for all or $8 each

Please let me know if you are interested by EOD.

Thank you in advance.
Keep Dreaming,
Aimers

Mr. Pickles

2008-03-18T11:33:00.000-07:00

If I owned a Mr. Pickles franchise I think I would decorate mine with charcoal sketches of Princess Diana. I would also have a couple of Marilyn Monroe prints and maybe even a small Nagel by the men's bathroom. Instead of giving lollipops I would have a little jar full of Jolly Ranchers. I would sell Disney Beenie Babies. I would play light rock so that hopefully Candle in the Wind would play at least four times per 8 hour work shift.

Aimers

Aimer's Lil' Sister

2008-03-17T14:14:00.000-07:00

I was excited to find an email in my inbox this morning from my little sister. She lives in Idaho so I don't get to see her too often. But, she wrote to inform me of an award she won last week through a marketing club she is involved with through her high school. She ended up winning first place out of 80 kids that were in the running. Now she gets to go to Georgia for the National event. Aimers is very proud of her little sister.

Erin Go Bragh

2008-03-17T14:01:00.001-07:00

Here's to St. Patrick's day and the wonderful night at Thomas Langtry's Saturday where we celebrated with Guiness, Bailey's, Jamieson's, corned beef and cabbage, a bitchin' soundtrack featuring Thin Lizzy ...Musha ring dumma do, damma da, Whack for the daddy 'ol, Whack for the daddy 'ol, There's whiskey in the jar......oh...and most importantly my best friends....BOB haircuts forever bitches!!

Aimer's Incomplete List of Hobbies

2008-03-12T16:22:00.000-07:00

Hello friends,

I compiled a list of neat hobbies that you may want to consider to replace your drinking. I originally compiled this list specifically for Maureen, but thought that all of you may find it helpful

***Please note this is not a complete list of hobbies****

toy train collecting
rubber stamping
antiquing
birding (calling and watching)
magic and/or illusion
radio controlled vehicles (since that one shop is right by you that sells them)
quilting/sewing/pattern making/dress making
flower arranging
bunko
bridge
lock picking
stenciling
composting
building geraniums
kite flying
freshwater or saltwater aquariums
genealogy
ham radio
puppetry
tombstone rubbing
canning
macrame
needlepoint
watercolor painting
calligraphy (may also include writing Chinese/Japanese characters)
origami
stamp/coin collecting
candle making (this can include soaps/lotions/and massage oils too)
metal detecting
pinochle
rocking AIDS babies
building dollhouses
antique car restoration
astronomy (this goes well with hiking)
sheet shooting
butterfly watching
crossword/jigsaw puzzles
making ships in bottles
dog breeding
face painting
walking

I hope that this list inspires you all to do something great.

Toodles, Aimers

White Zin vs. Rose

2008-03-12T10:03:00.001-07:00

A couple of summers ago it seemed that wherever I went someone had a bottle of chilled Rose. I thought Rose was just a fancy term for White Zin, a wine I began making fun of when I started waiting tables in 1991. When you work in a restaurant it's always a certain type of lady that orders the white zin, and I don't want to be that lady. Piernas and I have been debating over white zin vs. rose forever, so let's put it to rest.

Blush and rose wines are light-bodied and usually chilled, which makes them perfect for drinking at summer picnics and barbecues. Bob Trinchero drinks his white zinfandel as a before-dinner cocktail, and also likes to pair it with spicy curry dishes.

Rose wines are made the same way as blush wines - the red grape skins are left in the juice briefly, giving the wine a pink color and minimum tannins - but they are usually drier (less sweet) than white zinfandel. Magic Boy drinks them with chicken wings and mac 'n cheese, which usually gives her a headache.

I hope this helps all of you that have also been questioning Rose wines.
Cheers!
Aimers

Jack Gallagher

2008-03-10T12:11:00.001-07:00

Jack Gallagher isn't related to Gallagher, but he is a comedian. He is also living in Sacramento. Throughout the years I've had several run ins with Jack Gallagher (listed below).

1. Sierra View Country Club Mid 1990's-Jack did a stand up act during one of our charity tournaments, this was during his Crystal Ice Cream years, I was starstruck.

2. Southwest Airlines flight to Phoenix 4 years ago-I was going to corporate office, he was listening to I-pod, he was isle seat, I was window seat. I tried to see what he was listening to on his I-pod but this was before I got my reading glasses. I imagined it was Led Zep's ZOSO album.

3. Pancake Breakfast at Elementary School. Jack and family were standing right in front of me I was able to get this picture of him, everyone in his family is tall, his oldest son was wearing a Ramones t-shirt, skinny jeans, and checkered slip on Vans.

I have yet to work up the courage to speak to Jack Gallagher but I feel like it could happen in the coming year.

Power Ranger

2008-02-26T14:14:00.000-08:00

I was just going through my Samsung and came across this little gem. I mean, if that's not the cutest little power ranger I've ever seen, then I don't know who is. This was a happy day.

Aimers

Awesome Wizard

2008-02-26T13:57:00.000-08:00

Aimers is getting really awesome at art lately, I mean, I'm not trying to brag, but this wizard picture is probably around the most best thing I've done in years. I don't know, I was just inspired by the howling wind and the lunar eclipse and this wicked wizard popped in my head, so I drew him. This is actual charcoal on standard white paper. However, I will be making t-shirts to sell and 10X12 silk screen posters for anyone intersted.

T-shirts $20
Posters $10

These prices do not include tax and I'd prefer that you let me know your order asap so I can get a good grasp on how many I will be needing.

Thanks,
Aimers

P.S. I can also draw merlins if you so prefer.

Opossum Girl

2008-02-26T11:09:00.000-08:00

Whew, going through my garage this weekend, I finally found my opossum stuffed animal that I've had since I was a baby. It's why I have such a fascination with opossums, and clearly from this picture, why you can see I identify so well with the look of an opossum.

I'm really ecstatic.

Lates,
Aimers

Aimers Favourite Live Albums of All Time

2008-02-21T15:33:00.000-08:00

My favourites (that's how the English write it) listed in no particular order:

Paul Rodgers "Live in Glasgow"
Rainbow "On Stage"
Jethro Tull "Bursting Out"
Yes "Yessongs"
Deep Purple "Made in Japan"
Eric Clapton "Rainbow Concert"
Free "Live"
Free "Songs of Yesterday (disc 4)"

Bad Company "Live in Albuequrque" (no longer available and it's not the best sound but it captures Bad Company during a great tour which I caught the show at MSG)

Led Zeppelin "How the West Was Won"
Black Crowes with Jimmy Page
Rush "All the Worlds a Stage"
Derek and the Dominos "Live at the Fillmore"
Ted Nugent "Double Live Gonzo"
Lynyrd Skynyrd "One More from the Road"
Foghat "Live"

Wish List

2008-02-21T15:21:00.000-08:00

There is a GOD!! Can someone please purchase this Slash action figure for Aimers? It's avaialbe on Amazon.com and is made by MacFarlane Toys, it is $49.99

Details: original paint - Scale: 6-inch - Format: action figure - Packaging: clamshell - - One of rock 'n' roll's most famous and accomplished guitarists in a signature pose complete with leather jacket and tophat. Includes support base, guitar, amp and speaker

Thanking you in advance.

Aimers

Do NOT BUY THE PT Cruiser

2008-02-21T15:05:00.000-08:00

Hello all, I just wanted to pass down some very useful information in regards to purchasing a PT Cruiser. My cousin, Cynthia, sent me an email this morning because she never showed up for dinner at my house last night. I was really worried about her until I checked my gmail inbox. I'm sharing her email with you all as I know many of you have expressed interest in the purchase of a PT Cruiser and have asked my adivce and opinion on the car in the past, please read this from Cynthia and be advised:

Dear Cousin Aimers,

I want to thank you all for your concern and I apologize for my absence. I've been having issues with my vehicle and I just barely got home from another break down. Let's just say that I won't be getting another Pt Cruiser, especially the first model. First it was the oil, barley had any, and there must be leak in my coolant tank, which causes overheating. Horrible noises from it too. It's embarrassing. And I need a tune up. It must be nice having money...

However, Auntie is ill and she is not going to be working. So, she is willing to let Mom and I borrow her Pt Cruiser (which is still new) for tomorrow night. So hopefully, I'll have dinner with you tomorrow. Actually, no thoughts about it, I will be there tomorrow night. I have nothing stopping me. Just wanted you to know. And again, I apologize. Have a pleasant evening.

~ Cousin Cynthia

Just Thinking

2008-02-19T15:34:00.000-08:00

Does anyone else find it odd that Britney has no time for court appearances Sean Preston, or Jayden James.......buuuuuuttttttt has plenty of time to wax her twicket and go to Rite Aid for lipsticks?

Slash Sketch

2008-02-04T12:19:00.000-08:00

Slash is pretty much awesome so I spent the better half of my Saturday sketching this picture of Slash totally jamming out. What did everyone else do this weekend?

Aimers

Stilts

2008-01-25T16:31:00.001-08:00

I finally overcame my fear of heights and headed down to the Hansel J. Kubric stilt walking course held at Sierra II through the Learning Exchange. This $50 course lasts five hours and teaches you how to construct your own stilts, which costumes get your crowd pumped, how to actually walk around on stilts, how to get out of your stilts and caring and storage of stilts. Excrutiating at first, I was open to everything Hansel had to say and within the first hour of instruction was up and able to walk. Hansel laughed and said I looked sort of like a baby colt, I had to laugh too, I really did.

Now to give this gift back to you, my fans, I'm offering to work birthday parties and corporate events for $25 per hour. This does include balloon animals and funny jokes with the costume seen in the picture (can be subsituted for a jazz singer).

Shoot an email if you're interested.
Thanks
Aimers

Our Attempt at Going Green

2008-01-23T11:36:00.000-08:00

Saturday afternoon, was beautiful and sunny. Taking a cue from the recent media onslaught of all the white people going green, we decided to pick the orange tree in the front yard. Winding up with nearly 100 ripe, juicy Naval oranges, we made a sign and took the fruits of our labor to the corner over by Crepeville (douche central). It was an uncomfortable feeling, being stared and pointed at by the weekender in Curtis Park crowd. But, within minutes a Volvo, corn powered VW Westfalia, and Toyota Prius all pulled up in unison. People were out of their cars with their recyleable grocery bags in hand, filling them to the top with our delicious and well priced oranges. We sold out in under 10 minutes.

We took the $10 we made and bought a pack of cigarettes and some gasoline.
It really ended up being worth our while and this just goes to show how much money we can make off of these go-green bastards.

Four Eyes

2008-01-23T09:38:00.000-08:00

As if life couldn't get any more exciting for Aimers, it all changes with one eye examination. Last week I went and saw Dr. Fong, an optometrist over in Natomas, right by Applebee's. Through the examination of my eyes, Dr. Fong was able to determine that I have a hard time focusing, go figure. Three days later I have these glasses to use while I sit at my computer or read. It feels a little like being in a bubble, but I have found that my ability to focus has been extraordinary. I'm reading so much more now and feel much smarter already. I think it is safe to say that I will climb at least one step on the proverbial career ladder in no time.

Thanks Dr. Fong.
~Aimers

Found...but Lost

2008-01-16T14:37:00.001-08:00

Found dead dog

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: comm-538742498@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-01-14, 9:11AM PST

I found a reddish brown smaller dog (about 40 pounds) that had been hit by a car and died by the side of the road. Male with rather large upright ears and reminded me of some type of a terrier but not a pit bull - no pit bull. It had short hair and a pointed nose - maybe a mix but it was hard to tell the exact breed - as I kept looking at his upright larger ears and they seemed big for a smaller dog. I wish I had taken a photo of him but didn't think of it at the time. Reminded me of a fox but his tail was not bushy. The County Pound has the information on him. I don't have more details because it was sad and hard for me to carry him - but I didn't want to leave him by the side of the road. He reminded me of one of my dear dogs - may he rest in peace.

Johnny The Motivational Retard

2008-01-16T13:45:00.000-08:00

This picture is of Barbara Glanz, a motivational speaker, this video clip is some bullshit that Barb concoccted to motivate people while making money off of her DVD and book. If you have a minute, watch the clip.

http://www.simpletruths.com/simpletruths/a.aspx?af=219&mo=stsr

This was passed through to me by Mel who had received as a work email along with a string of one hundred comments like "WOW, this really touched my heart" and "THIS IS BEAUTIFUL -- PLEASE WATCH!!!!". After watching and discussing with my associates, we were ready to puke through our hands. There are some major holes in this story, as in, I doubt Johnny had written enough daily quotes with the help of his dad to be prepared for that triple length line that went to the frozen isle section. Why do people believe this stuff? Do they really think that Johnny the retarded bagger has the ability to change the world one post-it at a time? Do they really believe that Johnny even exists? I mean do people named Johnny even exist?

Well, to answer that question, Johnny Bookout existed. His story was sad, not inspirational. I mean really, just an adopted foul-mouthed kid who tortured his sister and her friends. Never moved out of his parents' home, worked intermittently as some sort of mechanic but mainly sold drugs out of his parents' garage. Johnny died of an overdose in his childhood bed at the age of 35. While he wasn't as inspirational as Johnny the Retard, he did coin the terms, taco twins and burrito sisters for J-Mo and Mel and referred to his sister and mom as m-fers.

It's unfortunate I don't have any DVD's or books about Johnny Bookout. But think of him the next time you want to forward an interesting awe inspiring story to your co-workers, you'll thank me for it.

The Connection

2008-01-16T13:21:00.001-08:00

The first time it happened I was at my Grandma Jane's house. She had a picture cut out of this actress and was telling the family how this girl looked just like me, it was Meg Ryan, I think I was like 15 or 16 and had no idea who she was but was kind of embarassed by the whole thing and how everyone kept doing there comparing. Being an awkward little opossum, I didn't really know how to react. Since then, some 20 years ago, I've gotten about one Meg Ryan comment per month per year. Now, it has become a joke with my friends and I. It's almost like getting a beaver shot, you never know when it is going to happen, and you certainly can't prepare, but when you get one...wow. This weekend as Mel Mel and I inched up to the bar, it happened, right there in front of everybody. Now, I've put it out here to the world, and I bet just like that the comments will stop. It's ok though, because Meg is looking a bit hurt these days.

Happy hunting.
Aimers

Let's Not Forget

2008-01-16T12:59:00.000-08:00

In the not so far away past this was what Katie Holmes looked like. Herpes, long lifeless hair, glasses, total NERD!, agreed? Over the last year, with the help of her robotic and scientologic husband, she has transformed into a sort of modern day vampire blow up doll yet American sweetheart. It's creepy. I don't get it, but will say, that this transformation will hopefully gives girls like Britney some hope and peace of mind that they to can turn it all around. Maybe instead of having turned to Madonna and the kaballah, Britney should've turned over $19.95 to buy that L.Ron Hubbard book and had been able to have Tom and Katie at her beckon call. Hopefully, it isn't too late, and if all else fails, Dr. Phil seems to have it handled.

I'm rooting for you BRIT!!

Being an Aunt

2008-01-11T16:33:00.000-08:00

Dudes, as you know I adore being a mom. It's my greatest since of accomplishment and my kid is the most fun and creative guy that I've ever met. He keeps me laughing non-stop and makes me think in different ways.

But, being an Aunt is also pretty fucking great. Being an Aunt means you don't have to stay too long, but that you get to dole out sugar and let your niece stay up way too late. Being an Aunt means that your niece can eat as many Bartlett pears as she wants while smashing them into her pretty pink clothing. Being an Aunt means that everyone can run wild and make a mess and I don't even have to pick it up. But most importantly, being an Aunt means that I am somebody's favorite person, and that's just cool.

Fur Trimmed Even

2008-01-11T16:32:00.000-08:00

One of our own has a pair of pink fur lined crocs. They are kept by her front door. She says she uses them around the house and hasn't actually left the house with them on, but later admitted to taking the garbage to the street in them. I got this action shot of the crocs on a current visit to her East Sacramento home. I'm not sure how I feel about any of it. Only time will tell if these wounds can be healed.

Dr. Fox

2008-01-02T17:04:00.001-08:00

When I was little my mom and granny went to this dentist, Dr. Fox.
He's the one that made that gold miner statue in old town Auburn.
In addition to his gold miner, he created and erected huge nude females in front of his dentist's office that shoot arrows into the blue, blue sky...and most importantly he is also the one my mom posed nude for in exchange for free dental work.

Yesterday we took Gio by to see the statues and I took it as an opportunity to let him know that the statue in my granny's backyard of the naked female by the pool is actually his grandmother and that these beautiful nude bow and arrowers were also inspired by her sweet sweet bod. The apple-bottoms don't fall too far from the tree.

Robert Smith's Weather

2007-12-06T12:56:00.000-08:00

I woke this rainy Thursday morning with a dream. I dreamt that Robert Smith was a national weather man and every day he predicted the same thing. Rainy, cold, and grey days.

Big Shot

2007-11-29T09:36:00.001-08:00

Who takes a limosine to work? I mean, I didn't have time to wait around and find out, but I imagined it was overweight office ladies, whose boss man paid for the limo, so they could go to the outlet stores for the day to Christmas shop. This would be Aimers worst nightmare, yet a predicament that I could see myself getting into with no way out.

Peace be with you,
Aimers

Stitches and stuff....

2007-11-20T14:43:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I've not been blogging lately, shit just hasn't been that interesting lately I guess. But here is some stuff on my mind:

My stitches are out and everything on my arm is healing up fine, a bit dry, but fine. I think I might need ointment.

I'll be happy to have five days off for Thanksgiving and will eat a lot of food. I wish I were in Cancun with the Burritto Sisters, that sounds pretty nice.

I hope I don't catch a cold, because everyone seems to be sick. I hate it when people are sick. I don't want to be around them. I don't like coughing or sniffling.

Ummm, oh, the Bachelor was pretty funny last night, most dramatic rose ceremony ever. That dude turned out to be a real dick. But, those girls have to be pretty stupid to date a twin, creepy.

I miss the Pick Up Artist and wish that I were Canadian. I'm considering becoming a goth for the winter months, but the winter months don't seem to be coming, so I'm not sure now.

I want to see the new Cohen Bros. movie, Gio is reading, Mary J's album is coming out on December 18th, my windshield still needs replacing as does my right tail light, I don't like it when people eat ice, I dislike the store Kohl's, and I still hate cinammon.

I guess that about wraps it up....oh one last thing, my washer broke.
Have a good holiday if I can't think of anything intersting before then.

Aimers

How to Ask Aimers for an Autograph or Photo

2007-11-15T13:26:00.001-08:00

1.Aimers is just a person. She has a real life and responsibilities; make sure your timing is appropriate for what you want. Fans are appreciated but keep in mind that no one wants to be ambushed exiting the lavatory stall or with a mouthful of dinner at a business meeting over at Johnny Carino's.

2. Understand that Aimers is used to people asking her for autographs. She takes it in stride, so don't be too nervous.

3. Approach Aimers, but don't get so close that it annoys her. Say "Hi," tell her your name, and give a light compliment. Do not gush - she doesn't enjoy it. Ask a question or two. Comment on whatever she's famous for.

4.Hold out a pen and paper, but don't stuff it into her hands. Ask for an autograph by saying "I'd love to have your autograph," or "May I take a picture with you?" Don't be shy. Be confident and smiley.

Hope this helps, and if I've EVER offended any of you my loyal and devoted fans, please know that I must've have been having a bad case of the Mondays.

Dave and Buster's

2007-11-13T15:43:00.000-08:00

It was only a matter of time before they developed a Chuck E Cheese for the corporate minded adult. I don't know how much worse things can get. Dave and Buster's boasts over 200 video games, specialty drinks, and an "awesome" menu, which includes philly cheese steak rolls and a drink called the shizzle. They also offer special banquet rooms for all of your work hard/play hard corporate events. I guess it was only a matter of time, now I can only hope that Natomas gets a Dave and Busters.

Vamp Le Stat

2007-11-02T11:49:00.001-07:00

I'm pretty much screwed, and have been bit by a little vampire. Symptoms include, thirst for blood, being tired, wearing all black, shopping at hot topic, drinking lots of coffee, complaining, putting too many bumper stickers on my car, listening to Bauhaus, buying china flats, excessive clove smoking, dancing with fog machines, pessimism, and hanging out at the Birdcage Walk. If you know a good cure, other than The Cure, please let me know immediately, would like to be back to my bubbly optimistic self as soon as possible.

Aimers

Flags

2007-10-29T10:06:00.000-07:00

Finally, something exciting has happened. As I came into work this morning and opened the front door, I was bombarded by the huge flags you see in the picture. There are seven of them and they line the main thoroughfare of our building. No longer are you able to walk through without trying to avoid the flags, and even then, they touch the top of your head as you walk past. There is no explanation as to why the flags have been bolted to the wall, nor any discussion as to what is going on.

There is some speculation that this could have to do with PRIDE or a "Drive to /Fast Track to Success" campaign. I will keep you posted.

Lady Comics

2007-10-16T14:01:00.000-07:00

A comedian, or comic, is a performer who entertains an audience by making them laugh. This might be through jokes or amusing situations, or acting the fool, as in slapstick, or employing prop comedy. A comedian who stands and addresses an audience directly is called a stand-up comedian.

I'm just sayin.

Is this thing on??

2007-10-09T07:36:00.001-07:00

Well, hello, I am back from my whirlwind of a trip to China. Not sure what to think about all of it yet, I'm a bit out of it and already back to work.

Let me start by saying I now know more than ever that we are very spoiled living in the U.S. I also know that it is pretty hard to keep your balance and not pee on your ankles while you teeter over a hole in the ground to piss. I saw lots of neat things and hope to get some pictures posted to one of those fancy websites where you can make a slideshow real soon.

In other news, Gio lost his first tooth....and I missed it. I was real bummed about that, but was able to make a call to the tooth fairy, via mobile phone, to let her know to wait to come bring him money in exchange for his very small German tooth.

Oh...and one more thing, everyone had really neat cell phone charms in Hong Kong.

Peace out bitches,
Aimers

Zai Jian

2007-09-26T10:08:00.000-07:00

This will be Aimers last blog until Oct 8th or thereabouts. Heading out to Hong Kong with Shanghai Shirley tomorrow. I'm nervous and excited. I need everyone to keep me updated on who Bret Michaels will choose as his love mate on the Rock of Love, is it going to be Heather or Jes? Totally up in the air. Did I mention I was nervous?

Ok, see you next week.

Aimers

The Chad's of the World

2007-09-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

Some things Chad loves:

Linkin Park
Maroon 5
Nickleback
Fall Out Boy
Beer
Watersports
The new 7 series BMW, sick.
Bringing sexy back
Cabo/Hawaii
Wakeboarding/snowboarding/any sort of boarding
Girls who are cool to just kick it...and a bangin body doesn't hurt either!

Dislikes:
Smokers
A poor attitude
Laziness
Anyone that wants to judge and not have a good time
Last call

RIP BIP

2007-09-24T10:44:00.001-07:00

We lose yet another mime in an ever descending population of mimes. Marcel Merceau, popularized the art of mime, and his character BIP, was adored by mime enthusiasts and performance artists world wide. Marceau took the art of mime further than the traditional... trapped in a box or frantically searching for rope, Marcel was the master of mime, and now sadly, he is taken from us at 84 years of age.

It seems like only yesterday that I was quietly watching VHS tapes of Marcel in my bedroom, age 11, thinking of all the ways I would paint my face, "if only I could afford white and black pancake make-up from Sprouse Reitz", I always thought to myself. "If only mother and the rest of the world, would understand the importance of mime". Then one day my dreams all came true, I started working at Laugh's Unlimited, Tuesday, day shift, where I was able to practice mimery, while serving appetizers to the Capitol Crowd. I did this for three weeks straight, until I was asked to leave, apparently Laughs wasn't ready for the art of mime.

As you know, Fans of Aimers are fans of mimes....and so I leave you with these parting words from Mr. Marcel Marceau, Master of Mime.

"Do not the most moving moments of our lives find us all without words?"

~Marcel Marceau

I think a moment of silence would be appropriate.

God Bless, fans, Aimers.

Sheriff Lou Blanas

2007-09-24T09:55:00.000-07:00

As you gaze at this picture with all of the beautiful shades of green, and J-dog's face smiling in the corner, don't let your eyes fool you. Take a closer look, right there by the red arrow and you will see ex-sheriff Lou Blanas downing a cocktail with his bros. It looked like a strong drink, as it was in one of the smaller glasses and was clear with a toothpick. Did I mention it was 11 a.m.? Retirement must be so sweet. Hope he got a hold of Sherm for a ride home.

Aimers

Trippin off Sherm...and other things.

2007-09-24T09:36:00.000-07:00

It is hard to determine why scads of moped riding twenty somethings hit the streets of Sacramento this weekend, but it was freaky and uncomfortable. Friday BFF and I went dancing only to realize the entire club was filled with some sort of moped gang, it was awkward and we felt twice our age. I guess its best not to relive those things you once found so cool...I mean...dancing to 80's music is best done in the 80's, and to try to relive it is pretty disgusting, at least on our part. It's more pathetic than kitschy. With that said, we needed a ride home, so we called BFF's main cabbie, Sherman. To our surprise his number was disconnected, so now we're trippin' off sherm.

Slow Your Roll

2007-09-21T10:02:00.000-07:00

One must be careful not to get too big for their britches, even if those britches are slim legged Premium Levi's that cost you a couple of hundred dollars to look cool for the kids.

Question to Kanye: Remember Mase? Yeah, didn't think so.

Just check yo' self, is all I'm sayin, check yo self.

Aimers

That's a WRAP people!!

2007-09-18T14:49:00.000-07:00

Look people, I don't want to buy any of your kid's wrapping paper. If I have one more desperate parent enter my office with scads of paperwork and excel spreadsheets begging for money for Taylor and Brianna's school fundraiser, I'm going to fucking lose it. I've got my own fundraising to do, shit. By the time I buy all this wrapping paper, I'm not going to have money left to have anything to wrap...doesn't anyone get this? Also note: I will not buy cookies, magazines, chocolates, Candlelight, Pampered Chef, Avon, Mary Kay, or anything remotley like any one of these things.

Thanks in advance.
Ms. Aimee

Dr. Silverman's Office

2007-09-18T12:06:00.000-07:00

I went to see Dr. Silverman, dermatologist and father of Sarah this morning. This was the waiting room, lots of AARP magazines as well as Time and Newsweek. One man, when asked his birthday by the receptionist, said, "November 10th 1920, I'm as old as dirt". Is that true? I don't know. It seemed like he was telling a tall tale. Well, the bad news for me in the life of aimers, is that I've got some crazy mole that needs to be surgically removed pronto. I'm kind of tripping, but like Tupac says, keep yo' head up. Which reminds me, I haven't made a Tupac memorial blog.

I gotta go!!
Aimers

Just like Ronnie said.....

2007-09-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

Whoa, i'm patiently awaiting the verdict in the case of Phil Spector. What a sorted story he's got going on here. A real Hollywood tragedy with all the right ingredients to make a made for television movie on Lifetime. I really don't know what to believe, but do know that Spector has some snazzy taste. His 27 year old wife is one lucky lady.

Aimers

Lil' Aimers

2007-09-13T08:10:00.000-07:00

As my birthday quickly approaches, I still feel like a child. Not yet ready to grow up and face the world, not yet ready to believe this is it, quick to play all day and dream. Bluebells and cockle shells.

Here is a poem my mom wrote to me as I approached my third birthday:

Aimee Bree almost three and what a big girl you have grown to be.
Blue eyes and blonde hair, in my mind you are always there.
Running and laughing in the sun, it always looks like you are having so much fun.
Eating peanut butter and watching TV, oh how I wish that I was almost three.

Love,
Mom

Raider Nation

2007-09-11T14:50:00.001-07:00

Welp, I finally did it. I plunked down $250 and got my very own Raider's tattoo by Wild Bill on Sunday. I've been wanting to do this for so many years, and finally on Sunday, my brother says to me, he says, "hey, sis, let's get those Raiders tattoos we've been talking about since Jr. High, we'll get em' for PaPa"....so I says to him, I says, "OK", and three excrutiating hours later, voila. Just in time for Monday night football. Whose making the seven layer dip?

Aimers (wow, it even sounds kinda like raiders)

Crash Em' Up Derby

2007-09-10T09:55:00.000-07:00

Hi there,

I found this little feller in Auburn last night. He was the consummate professional, announcer, for the crash em' up derby at the Auburn County Fair yesterday and what a job he did. Not only did he keep his cool, for over two hours by doing wide leg stances while announcing, he got the crowd excited by instigating a dueling shouting match from each side of the bleachers, you know...."ok EVERAY BODAY on that side I want you to say WATER.... and on this side I wanna hear you say TRUCK", and then as he'd cup his ear to one side, they'd scream "WATER!!!", and then he'd do that cutsey fake jog back to the other side with an ear cup and a motion of the arm to be really loud and the crowd would go wild "TRUCK!!!" and so on and so forth, total professional. I snapped this photo of him, when he was shooting the shit with the guy next to me, but as he saw me take it he came up, put his arm around Gio and gave a "shit eating grin" posing for another picture. God, it really doesn't get much better!!

Aimstein